Love, Undeserved
by DemonicTwister
Summary: It never ceases to amaze me, how much of a dimwit you are. You could have anyone, instead you love me, despite the hateful soul that you see behind this tame facade. Why can't you hate me?
1. Chapter One The Pain of One

**Love Undeserved **

Author: DemonicTwister

Rating: M

Disclaimer: I own nothing

Genre: Angst

**-------**

What do you see when you look at me? I'm sure everyone else would tell you that I'm a good little girl who acts perfect and sometimes the perfect victim, acting out so men will faun all over me. Stupid people, doing as I say, thinking me nothing more than a little kitten. They don't see the lioness, they don't see the predator that would relish at the sight of a man being castrated.

But not you, oh, no, heh, you see my true nature. You see the disgusting beast beneath the kitten's cute, helpless, little façade. I've always thought that the moment that someone saw what I was really like, then they'd despise me. Once again, not like you…..completely unlike you. You always saw the real me. The real, cold, cruel me that hid behind the smile. And you loved it! You loved me. Me, an evil bitch. Me, who never gave you anything except pain and misery.

Almost all who see me, smiling pleasantly, acting as if I'm the little victim who needs comforting, the vulnerable damsel in distress, want to hold me, caress me and kiss me, all because I can hold a façade of a frightened little girl…..on the outside at least. But you….you see the starving tiger on the inside. You saw the claws yearning to come out and rake flesh from peoples' bodies. You saw what I was really like from the beginning.

Yet you always loved me! Why?!

You always wanted to hold, caress me, kiss me, make love to me, and not because of my façade. You wanted me for me. You wanted me for my true, brutal, cruel self…..how could I possibly deserve you?

I don't deserve you, you know. I don't.

I want to tell you that….but I feel so loved by you night after night. Your mouth all over me, your words by my ear, telling me how much you loved me, and that I deserved to be loved, adored and cherished, that YOU would always love and adore me, no matter what, I….hearing that, I just can't bring up the will to tell you off.

I know that you deserve someone far better than me. Someone who says you're beautiful every moment like you do for me. Not someone like me, who spends every moment degrading you, telling you how retarded you are, that you're worthless and that no one gives a fuck about you.

Every time I tell you this, you just close your eyes, sighing patiently, and I can tell that I'm hurting you, even though you're clearly suppressing any signs of pain.

You just stand up from our bed and walk to the bathroom, grumbling about me being PMS or something. Or rather, your bed is a more accurate term, but it's become "ours" since you welcomed me into it. I deserve to be told that I'm a worthless skank, yet you could never tell me that, could you? Because you don't even believe that. You know my true nature, yet never once have you called me a slut, bitch or whore like I deserve. You saw my true nature, but you didn't see what everyone else WOULD have seen if they saw the real me.

I remember actually once asking what you thought of me, with a cruel tone in my voice I might add, and your exact words to me were, "You're the most beautiful, cruel, arrogant, sassy, degrading of everyone else, the most selfish, uncaring, and confidant woman I've ever known and you're mind blowing, my baby."

And let's not forget how almost poetic you are when you speak about me. How you praise me as if I'm a gem, a treasure to be loved and protected always.

It's ridiculous. What are you doing with me? You're a complete dimwit, you know?

It's funny, it's really funny, you know? Because the classic tragic story is about the person that's suffering is being physically abused by her boyfriend, and then told that only the boyfriend would ever love her.

But here, you are the "boyfriend" in the relationship, you damn beast, you are the dominant lover in this relationship, you are the one that makes me scream in pleasure every night, makes me throw my head back and shriek as you devour me. You are the one that dominates me in bed every night.

And yet, you allow me to call you all that I have. I am the one that talks about you degradingly and you allow it. You roll your eyes, sigh sadly, as if you know that it's hopeless to reason with me as I say these things.

You, you're proud, you're strong, you're dominant, why can't you tell me that I'm a bitch? Why can't you just smack me and say that I'm a slut or a fucking whore? Please, tell me that I'm a whore, darling….I deserve it for all I've said and done to you.

How can you just hold me in your arms the way you do? How can you just caress me and smile down at me adoringly as if I'm a treasure that should be guarded and cherished?!

You know, I still can't believe what you've said before and still do say, that you intend to repeat your years here in Fuuka high till I get out of High School so that we can go to college together. Sheesh, you're so loyal to me that you'll do anything for me.

You're a masochist, wanting to stay with me for so long, even after all the whole Hime crap and I put you through such pain.

It doesn't help any either that I adore you just as much.

I tell myself over and over that I need to separate myself from you, that I should break up from you. I know it would be for the best. You wouldn't have to deal with how much of a PMS bitch I am.

You wouldn't have to deal with my mood swings, you wouldn't have to deal with me telling you that you're worthless and that I don't love you, and that I could never care about you.

And you know what the part is that hurts me the most? It's that when I say this, you don't even flinch when I tell you that you're worthless and that no one else except me could deal with you and no one could love you. You don't even react to that, you never did.

But you always flinch as if you've been punched, when I tell you that **I **hate you and that **I **could never love you.

That's the part that kills me. You love me so much, that it doesn't matter what else it is that I say, it's when I tell you that **I **could never love you that hurts you the worst.

You could tolerate every torture in the world if it was for my sake. Every twisted pain that exists in the world you would allow, so long as it was for my sake. That's the reason why you deserve better than me. You would do anything for me. You deserve so much more than me, but that's why I can't break up with you. How could anyone let someone as precious as you go?

Thousands of young girls would dream and fantasize about having a man in their lives just like you. A guy that's just as chivalrous, kind, strong, loving, caring, protective, giving and self-sacrificing as you. You're not a man, but you're everything that a woman would want.

That's why I know I don't deserve you, but that's why I can't bear to make you leave me.

I know you deserve better, but I could never tell you off.

And that's the worst part, isn't it? You're the one being a victim here, being verbally abused continually by me, and I know it, but I can't stop. You really are an idiot, you know? What moron stays with her lover when her lover is being the biggest bitch in the world?

I of course tell you that you're an idiot, but you still say you love me. Of course, loving someone and being an idiot are probably the same things, right?

How can you just smile down at me as if I'm the most beautiful creature in the world, and hold me so lovingly as if I'm the most important thing in the world?

Night after night we have this routine. You continually caress me on the inside, and at the same time while making love to me, you dote on me as if I deserve all the praises that exist. You make every effort in the world to please me both physically and emotionally.

Like you're doing now.

I pant helplessly as my head is thrown back, my neck exposed to the darkness of the room as I gasp and as you stroke my breasts, back and forth in a very caring motion, occasionally squeezing them with both hands and flicking occasionally as well, the way I love it when you do.

My legs are wide open, though I'm desperately trying to close them. I want it so badly, but we have to stop this. We have to. I've put you through so much. I've told you how disgusting you are, that you don't even exist to me, that you don't matter. Come on, you don't deserve this!

But I can't give you better. I'm not any good for you. Why can't you see that? If everyone saw how I really acted, they'd be able to see plain as day what I am, but you see how brutally cruel and deceitful I am every day and night but you don't care about that.

Everyone sees me as a polite and sweet young girl, but you know that that's not what I really am, yet you love me anyway. Worship me even for all the deceit I show.

Now, as I feel you stroke your tongue over my moist opening, over my every wet spots, I can feel my climax rising as I buck underneath your mouth, your hands holding me down so I don't get away.

I'm ready to experience the full pleasure of your ministrations, when you hold back at the last minute. I groan; a sound of dismay, and I can feel you grin between my legs at the sound.

"Bitch!" I yell, "What are you waiting for?! Fuck me!"

"No," Came the husky reply, making me tremble, "I think not, sweetie. I think we both know what I'm waiting for."

No….oh hell, please don't…..

"No, you stupid beast….please." I whisper, trying to act angry, yet shaking now at what I realize what's about to happen.

"Say it, please." Came the gentle coo of your voice as you stroked my labia with your thumb, sending tremors through me, but not the release I desire.

Oh, god, she was going to make….. she wouldn't fuck, she wouldn't hurt me like I did deserve.

"No….I…" I mumbled, trying not to cry as my eyes widen at what was happening.

"Say it!" I hear you yell at me, yelling it in such desperation that I hate it because it almost makes me bend.

What kind of joke was this?! You're the most loving person in the world, and yet you love me, the most unlovable person that ever came into existence. An angel loving a devil whore? Was there some kind of religious story of satanic salvation that mocked the virtue of such a beautiful angel like yourself?!

A beautiful creature who was capable of such love granting me the same pleasure that those of light and beauty can be given? It must have been some twisted joke. There was no way I could deserve this.

Even as I feel the tidal wave about to take me, making me wither in agonizing pleasure, ripping shriek upon shriek from my helpless throat as your tongue invades my entire entrance completely and tortures that bundle of nerves between my lower lips I can't find the will to refuse you….

Once again, you hold back from granting me release, once again, you don't allow me what I need. I feel despair quaking through me at the longing of being touched.

The next words break me. "Tell me to love you, not fuck you, Nao." You say my name with such worship, and I can't stop the words, wanting to be loved by you more than anything in the world.

The next sound that came out of my mouth was a near sob. I desire your love, which you'll continually give, and I never deserved it.

"Please….love me,…..Natsuki." I whimper, breaking, wanting your love unconditional. The love that should have been taken from me long ago. I swear that I hear a triumphant hiss from below and I see a brief flash of dark blue as you duck back down to my core, your tongue now slicking over the round entrance there, sending voltages of through me as I'm forced to squeeze my eyes shut. My body can't take this.

Licking at me mercilessly now, thrusting your tongue in me, making sure I had the utmost pleasure, so determined to please me. Oh, Natsuki, damn you!

I scream, letting out all the anger and pain I feel along with the ecstasy that forces my body to convulse. My body moves back and forth to get more friction between my lover's tongue and my core.

When there's a crescendo of movement, I finally give way as the friction gives me the physical satisfaction I need.

At the height of my most pleasurable moment, though, I'm caught in a haze full of ecstasy and at that moment, I feel pain and agony, knowing full well what my pure moment of pleasure is the result of: Natsuki's unconditional love and affection and adoration that I've done nothing to earn or deserve.

Finally when I come down from the passionate, ecstasy filled haven that you send me to, my body calming down as a final cry rips from my throat, I'm no longer yelling, just crying and gasping and panting.

I whimper a little as I realize I've done to you again what I've always done to you, and you don't even give a shit.

You crawl up to me from where you've lain your head against my lower torso and wrap me up in your muscled arms, keeping me in a strong muscled band-like-grip that resembles steel chains.

Contradictory to the hard, tough, thick muscles of your arms that are wrapped around me, I'm rewarded with the feeling of your soft, warm chest where I can lay my head against. I sigh contently.

You know, Kuga, I know this sounds odd, but I sometimes wish that I hated you. Then it would be so easy to dump your ass and spare you this pain every night I tell you that I couldn't give a rat's ass about you, just to torment you, because I know you'd forgive me.

Once again, there's that unbearably endearing look that you give me, full of adoration, love and ultimate care, your emerald eyes that are so similar to mine shining with need. Your eyes are almost the same color as mine, but they're darker than mine, plus they hold an innocence and purity that mine could never hope to possess.

As I look into your eyes, I realize that yet another routine of me willingly coming to your bed and taking the love that I didn't deserve when I should dump you and spare you the pain of me telling you you're worthless, just to enjoy your pain has just taken place.

I hiss without really meaning to and bring my hands out from the iron clasp you have around me, getting my now clawed hands up to your startled face menacingly.

"Get the hell off me, Kuga!" I yell, struggling against you.

"Nao, what the hell?" You demand, squirming, trying to control my arms so I don't flail around so much.

You place your entire body on top of me, hoping that the warmth and weight from your body will both hold me captive as well as make me not want to escape. And it very nearly works. In only two seconds of you doing this trick, I already feel the desire to melt into your body, but am able to summon the will power.

Unfortunately for you, my sweet, not only that, but I'm faster than you and my nails rip the skin of your cheeks easily. I can't even think about the fact that I'm hurting you, I'm so angry with myself for allowing this to happen between us again.

There are red marks down your face as you get a hold of my wrists, holding my hands up now so that I can't move.

"Alright, Nao," You snap strictly, your eyes now locking with mine, "What's this about?"

I glare at how ignorant you are and snap, "What, do I have to have a reason for not wanting to sleep with a loser like you anymore?"

Again, I see the pain that I hate seeing in your beautiful eyes. It's a necessary, I remind myself, you deserve far better than me. You could have anyone, whose souls were better than mine.

Any woman or guy would want you. And you choose me, a PMS beast that insults you every night after we make love. If we can even call it that.

As you recover from the pain that I've inflicted on you, you state, "Nao, would you knock it off? You're just saying this because-"

"Because what?" I demanded, struggling against her, "Natsuki, we have to stop this. I want to break up with you."

There. That was it. That was the final blow that I knew would throw you from me into the cold. That would rip the small bit of love I have in this world from me.

Already, I can see the pain ripping through your face, threatening to destroy those perfectly heavenly eyes that have granted so many loving glances and stares. "Nao, what….?" Your pained voice is almost too much for me to bear, and I probably wouldn't be able to bear it, had it not been for my unshaken conclusion of what was to happen.

"Natsuki," I snap in a stronger voice, "We're going to stop this now. We have to."

"Why?!" Came the nearly pained demand, a torn look in your eyes.

We seem to stay like that for almost a minute, our eyes remaining locked. It's as if even though you're clearly hurt by what I'm saying, you seem to be challenging me.

"We're not having this conversation," You say, your voice carrying a heavily determined and almost angry tone, "YOU came into MY bed, night after night, don't you forget. Now you're trying to end what YOU started?"

That makes me hesitant to do anything. Your strong, passionate voice has always made my heart skip a beat, though I would happily swallow over eighty slimy frogs before admitting it.

"You've willingly come to my bed night after night, and you expect me to believe that you want it to end now?"

"What? A girl's not allowed to get tired of her toys?"

"That's a load of bullshit, Nao and we both know it."

"How hopeful you are, Kuga. Tell me, have you always been this desperate to be used and lost? Sheesh, talk about a beggar for the dumpster."

I see your eyes narrow at what I say and I realize I might have pushed you a little too much. Even if you do adore me. Being used and lost is a tender subject for you, I know.

But that's why I brought it up.

But that doesn't stop the pain of my thoughts, crying, _I'm sorry, Natsuki. I'm sorry, I'm sorry! _

Releasing my wrists cautiously, you remove yourself from your position next to me, up off of the bed. I keep my eyes on your naked form, my heart caught in my throat at the curves and the muscled limbs.

"I love you, Nao." You say, keeping your head turned away from me, but slanting your eyes so that they were fixed on me, "Nothing will change that, you know."

_Yeah, I know,_ I think to myself angrily, _And I hate you for making me fall in love with you for it. _

You worship, love and adore me. You could have anyone and yet you chose to spend time with me. Defending me against people on the street who just wanted to fuck me and be done with it.

The foolish little school boys here all desire me for being a frail girl, cute and tame, yet you know me for being the cruel, ruthless, cold hearted and unkind creature I am and you love it. That's what I can't stand. You love me for me, and yah know, that's kind of scary.

I watch you pick your clothes back up off of the ground, stringing them back over your body from where you've tossed them before, pulling your jacket over your shoulders.

"Kuga," Came my next hiss, "You don't have any idea what you're saying. Fuck off, okay? Who'd want some simpering, whiny bitch like you anyway?"

I can see that familiar look of you closing your eyes patiently, suppressing the words that are obviously affecting you so much. You say you love me, but can you love me after seeing me like this? I already know the answer to that one. After all, I say these things to you all the time, and you always are as patient as hell with me.

How I wish you weren't.

"Simpering or not," You say, your voice carrying a warning tone to it, "I'm not about to willingly let you go. Anyway, it's not like you really want it to end."

"You can't give me what I need, Kuga." I sneer, deciding to deliver the final blow to her feelings towards me, "I could find anyone else. All I have to do is show them what they want to see and they'll be all over me. I don't even need to show my real face to get laid."

The words seem to have the affect that I'd hope they would. You're now glaring at me and your right fist clenches hard, and I can tell that you're trying to restrain yourself from smashing your fist against the wall. Your teeth have also become clenched.

I hear you almost growling between your teeth, "Nao, we'll discuss this later. Though later I think you'll still come to me."

Oh, you just have to point that out, don't you? You just have to point out that I can't resist you.

"Think you're such a stud?" I ask challengingly, "Maybe if you wouldn't hold back from just flat out fucking me all the time and wanting me to beg for you then we wouldn't be having this discussion!"

That remark causes you to look at me like I'm an idiot. And I know I'll be told something pretty damn irritating, about how I deserve better than what I ask for.

"Whatever," I state, getting up from the bed as well, deciding to say something before you do, "Either way, we're finished, Kuga."

_Of course we're not finished. Not by a long shot. _I think to myself grimly, _Tomorrow night I'll happily and willingly crawl back into her bed, wanting her to hold me and smile at me again, wanting her love. _

You don't look too convinced by my words either, Natsuki. Although, right now you seem to be following my figure with hungry eyes and even though I just said that we're finished, naturally, I enjoy seeing you look at me with such desire.

It's ridiculous, really. Someone as wonderful as you could have anyone. Hell, you practically have someone in that Kyoto bitch, Fujino.

But of course, no, you said that Fujino is only your friend, and even after the Festival, you can't feel that way for her. Even after everything, I seem to be the only one you want.

I shiver as I feel your eyes almost burn me and I smile to myself ruefully. It was a pity that you wasted your love on me. We had this sad, tragic routine all the time. Me coming to your bed willingly, loving what your love and devotion feels like and then me getting aggravated with you for being so patient with me and calling you an idiot and worthless for tolerating me, wishing you'd slap me or something, but you'd always just love me, giving me what I don't deserve.

I'm lucky enough to have mama back after the Festival, how did I get so lucky as to gain the love of you of all people?

"Keep your stupid, perverted eyes on someone else, Kuga," I sneer, getting completely dressed, contradicting what I really want as usual, "I don't want you anymore."

"Yah think I'm going to believe that?" You demand and I just so want to smack you.

"Look," I grumble as a last resort, "Go chase after that Fujino bitch. Someone who actually wants you."

"Oi, how did Shizuru get back into the picture?" You ask, now looking startled, "Nao, firstly, she's my friend, so could you not talk about her that way? Second, because she's my friend, that's all I see her as, I've said this before. I love only you."

"Why?!" I spit out, your endless devotion to me driving me mad, "Why do you love me? I've done nothing except call you names and say that no one could ever love you. Why the fuck do you love me, of all people!"

Once it has landed on your dense mind that that is what this is about, you sigh, a slight sound of relief coming from your throat.

"Nao," You say gently, "I've told you before, I love you, more than anyone whose ever come into my life. I don't care how much of a bitch you are or act. I love you all the same."

I sigh, looking down at the ground as I'm fully dressed, "I swear, you're a masochist."

"And you are quite the sadist." You state and I can see out of the corner of my eye that you're grinning jokingly, "We're perfect for each other. Let's just see it that way."

I roll my eyes. Natsuki, you are amazing. I breathe deeply, trying to gain some control of my frustration.

I keep telling you that you are an idiot, but you always love me the same.

"I've told you before, Nao," You say calmly, "I love you. I want to stay with you. I'm going to tell you the same thing I did before, Nao, I'm going to repeat these last two years here till you're out of high school so that we can go to Fuuka College together. Even if you don't believe me, I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

"Why?" I grumble, feeling unable to do anything else, "You could have so much more with Fujino."

I hear a slight playful chuckle, "Ah, but Shizuru and I are just friends. I know how deeply she feels for me, but I can't feel that way back towards her. The person I love is you and only you."

Unwillingly, I close my eyes, hearing this.

I knew splitting up with her was the right thing, but as usual, I gave into the selfish desires that I always held.

"Don't leave me." I whisper, finally bending to the need I have for your love.

"I never intend to." You answer, wrapping your arms around my now shaking body and holding me close to your chest.

I find myself nuzzling into the warmth of your neck. I might not deserve your love, but I can't seem to tear myself from you either. Hell, I probably would have come back anyway after a couple of nights.

Once again, you whisper those forbidden words that I love hearing from you so much, "I love you, Nao. More than you'll ever know."

**Not what, the ShizNat fans expected, I know, but I did give an angst warning at least. I sort of wanted it to startle whoever was reading it, by keeping everyone in the dark for a while that it was Natsuki and Nao. **

**Sorry if I severely disappointed a lot of people, just a sad plot bunny decided to pop up in my brain. **


	2. Chapter Two Lover's Pain

**Love, Undeserved: Chapter Two: The Lover's Viewpoint: **

**Natsuki: **

I find it amazing that she sees herself the way she does. Hell, I understand why, but I guess I just can't fathom it. She's such a confident and strong willed young woman, I've ever known. My beautiful little Nao, my sweet, vicious little neko has given me such love marks all over me whenever I bring her to the brink of pleasure.

I smirk over my shoulder to see the latest mark on me from her from tonight. Damn, good thing I don't expose my back and shoulders at all. She's a total wildcat as she thrashes around underneath me in the throws of passion.

It's always a pleasure when she's not clawing at my face, too.

Watching her now, whimper in her sleep against my chest as I hold her protectively, knowing full well that she wasn't going anywhere, but the little wild lynx in my arms is always such a feisty one. It's hard to predict what action she'll take and if she wants to stay with me. I know she does, but she has so many mood swings that, well….

In any case, the girl certainly knows how to wet my appetite for her, without even knowing it. My sweet little Nao doesn't understand how lovable she is. I smirk as she grumbles in aggravation in her sleep. My precious gem is becoming restless, even as she sleeps.

How like my good little girl. My little Nao.

I then lay my head on the pillow, facing her beautiful face. She has become my reason for living. I know that that might be a little dramatic a claim, but it's true. Avenging my mother had been my priority back before the Festival had started. It had been my obsession.

It had been all I had thought about during that time and almost every day after her death when I was five. I had been so bitter that I had barely noticed that I had three dear friends in Mikoto, Mai and Shizuru.

This had cost Mikoto her innocence and to run to her brother who was the Obsidian Prince and Mai to be left alone, and Shizuru to snap her sanity in a million pieces.

One of the end results of her rampage at my rejection of her feelings for me was this beautiful little princess's heart shattering when seeing her child Julia being defeated, hence indirectly killing the girl's mother.

I don't know if it was the sorrow of her voice as she shrieked out for her mother when Shizuru defeated her, or if I was reminded of my own mother, but I just couldn't stand the sound of her cries.

You may try to tell me that I'm only with Nao out of sympathy or kindred hatred for those that hurt us, but it's not that. I love her more than life itself.

After my mother, I almost trusted no one. My mother was the light of my life, and when I was five, District One ripped that light from me. I didn't dare allow the light of my light that I had now to be destroyed.

My feelings for this little wildcat in my arms started breaking through my icy shield as she and I started our little affair after the Festival. I thought it was just physical attraction.

However, as I realized that my feelings for Nao resembled the feelings that a certain Kyoto born Kaichou felt for me, I found myself becoming more and more affectionate towards her, more and more loving and doting.

I told myself again and again that I shouldn't be doing such things. If I continued this way, Nao would most certainly know my feelings eventually and leave, out of anger and not wanting to be tied to anyone.

When she finally found out, she looked at me as if I was insane. She demanded to know if I had hit my head too many times during the Festival. She's always so bloody polite, don't you think? That was sarcasm in case you were wondering.

In fact she's quite the opposite. And I couldn't find myself happier with anyone else. Shizuru, I loved her, but as a friend, even the sister I never had. I know that that's somewhat cruel since that's somewhat of the last thing she wanted to be to me, that was how I always saw her and always will see her.

Nao will always be my one true love. Not anyone else.

The little firefly of a young girl that usually thrashed wildly around in my arms as I passionately made love to her was far too precious to me to taint in any way as I had seen so many other lovers do while I was growing up on the streets, avoiding my foster parents beating me up.

After I split away from my abusive foster home and managed to build a life and money for myself with the jobs I had, I felt at the time that that would be all I'd ever need. I was wrong. The fact that I had been happy with Mai, Mikoto and Shizuru as my friends was proof enough of that.

Then when my feelings for Nao started to emerge, I realized that not only did I want to be her lover, but I wanted to be with her for the rest of my life. As her lover, friend, confidant, and life mate.

Of course, when I realized all of this, I knew that Nao would be infuriated about my feelings towards her. Her self-loathing runs so deep….I've never understood why she feels that way towards herself. She's more confident than I'll ever be.

I chuckle at another mumble from Nao as she sleeps in my arms, and suddenly I feel the…heh…the "urge" to go to the bathroom. Go figure. I'm feeling perfectly happy, lying with my girlfriend and lover, happily watching her beautiful face and hearing her moans and my bodily functions decide to randomly kick in.

I sigh, managing to untangle myself from her, rather reluctant to leave her, (however, I doubt that she'd appreciated having urine all over her.)

I head towards the bathroom, taking one last loving glance at her before entering. After I was done and flushed and then washed my hands extremely well, I immediately hear a yelp from behind the bathroom door back in my bedroom. I immediately bolt out and head towards my bed, where I find Nao sitting upwards and looking around fearfully as if she's terrified to know that I'm not there anymore.

"Nao!" I whisper as I run to her, gathering her in my arms lovingly, "It's okay, I'm here. I just had to go to the bathroom."

"Ahh, jeez," I hear Nao yelp in my arms, "Your arms are cold, dumb ass."

I can't help but laugh at her rude remark, "Well, your little yelp caught my attention and I didn't get the chance to dry my arms off."

I hear her chuckle slightly, and remove herself from between my arms and look up at me fondly almost. I smile down at her. Seeing these looks from her are rare. Usually I'm the one that gives the loving attention between the two of us.

She still, I think has a hard time believing that I want to spend the rest of my life with her.

No matter how many times I've told her and then said that I want to repeat my years here at Fuuka Academy so that we can go to college together she rolls her eyes as if I'm saying this as a routine so that I can keep getting into her pants at night.

Although, I do occasionally feel like reminding her that I don't need to come up with something like that to get into her pants.

When I say this to her, she usually gives me the most adorable and infuriated blushes ever and I can't help but mentally hand it to Shizuru. I understood perfectly upon seeing Nao blush why Shizuru always teased me.

Nao worries me sometimes though. The way she speaks about herself. As if she's the scum of the earth and deserves to wind up dead in the gutter. She deserves far more than that.

My red-haired Queen deserves nothing else except love and care.

She's now snuggling back into my breasts and when she does this, it feels like I wish I'd have bigger breasts so that she'd enjoy the snuggling more.

However, I'll just cancel that rather embarrassing thought as I stroke my right hand along her back and gently caress the palm of my hand over the curve of her rear, eliciting a shiver from her as she purrs against me, making a vibration feel come through me.

I look over at the alarm clock on my nightstand and see that it's only 2:30 in the morning. I know, it might seem late and I'm sure you're gonna say, "shouldn't you kids be in bed by this time?" well technically speaking, we are in bed, but we hardly ever sleep unless we're passed out from our…routines….heh.

Nao and I hardly sleep. We're dark type of people. We're bored while the sun shines, but active when it's dark and we can stay up late. Nao sometimes has asked me in the past if I'm some type of vampire, since I never seem to get sleepy during the day.

Whenever she rarely asks me this, I smirk down and say in an exaggerated accent, "Madam, would you like me to suck your blood, or perhaps something else?"

"Well," I say, looking down at her again, in extreme affection, "Shall we….start, my love?"

When I say that, I swear that I see a slight tint of pink across her cheeks, but am able to restrain myself from teasing her about it playfully as I lay her down onto the bed, letting her feel my body lay over her own so that she can enjoy my warmth.

My leathers are all over the ground and I'm barefoot and only in shorts and a T-shirt, as is Nao. I close my eyes to enjoy the feeling of her skin against my own from our legs and arms and shoulders.

I whisper gently to her, "Why did you look so worried just now, baby? You know I'll never leave you, why were you so afraid?"

She looked away from me, glaring at the window to my room, still looking rather embarrassed, but not answering me at all. I sigh quietly, speaking out softly, "Nao, there's nothing wrong with admitting that you're afraid of abandonment."

"Well sorry if we can't all be a bunch of whiny saps like you," Nao sneered, still with her head turned, "and we can't all talk about our problems acting as if anyone else cares because you know no one does."

I barely restrain myself from flinching. Nao always says these things on nights when she's feeling particularly insecure about herself and our relationship. Unfortunately for me she usually feels insecure about "us" and so I get an ear load almost every night.

It doesn't help either that the loves to say the most painful things imaginable when she intends to wound someone. Her taunts of my father's abandonment of me in the hospital after mother's death and Shizuru's betrayal during the Festival are usually successful.

I don't dare tell her that my mother sold me to the Searrs company.

Speaking of which, a sudden thought came to me. "Nao," I say to her, cutting off her train of thought, "Forget the "I'm pissed so I'm gonna make Natsuki pissed" mission," I grumble out, "But I have to ask for a moment, have you told your mom about us?"

Nao stopped glaring out of the window and now looked surprised. She turned back to me, startled, however after a few moments of those gorgeous emerald eyes looking at me, she mumbled, "I've told her that I'm with someone who loves me beyond words and who treats me better than any man would."

Maybe it's a little weird to go from her insulting me till I'm glaring to her praising me and me wanting to hug her. But we're weird. I smile at what she told me she's told her mom, and lean down, embracing her smaller body to mine possessively.

I love how she burrows herself in my warm neck, smelling me there. I close my eyes at the feeling and sensation. My beloved Nao desperately wants to indulge in the treatment that she so dearly deserves, but doesn't believe that that treatment should be given to her, hence her self-loathing.

I feel my beloved's head being balanced on my shoulder by her chin. I can't help but chuckle playfully at this action, "So what good deed have I done to deserve you going from insulting me with curdling remarks to near domestic bliss?"

I catch a glimpse of her emerald right eye as I glance to my right and I swear that I can see the words "because you love me" going through her mind, showing it cross her eyes. The words almost reading in her eyes as I fixed my gaze on her own.

However, I don't dare mention this, unless I want to shatter the brief spell of the affection and soft love that so recently has shown up in my Nao's usually hateful gaze.

I gently, deciding to go on that moment and started pushing my hands up her shirt from underneath, gently stroking over her ribcage, which rewards me with a shiver and a slight gasp from her throat as I watch her eyes flutter beautifully at the sensations of my treatment.

"Is there something wrong, my Queen?" I ask gently, whispering it gently in her ear as she writhes when my hands wander up and down further, stroking over her stomach to back up to the space between her breasts, not daring to touch either of them yet, wanting to torture her a little.

"Damn it," I hear Nao hiss, bringing a smirk to my face, "Don't you start this again, Kuga. Do it, touch me or I'm gonna be pissed."

"Wow, that's going to be a big change." I chuckle sarcastically, however, I do decide to grant her wish. I cup her breasts tenderly, one mound in each hand and gently stroke over all the softness there. I'm as careful as possible always with her, but I know I need to be quite tactful, lest Nao not get the pleasure she needs.

I'm busy pushing her shirt over her breasts, mindful of her gasps at my touches and cups of her chest as I lean down and replace my right hand from her left breast with my mouth while keeping my left hand on her right breast.

The cries that are now ripped from her throat are far too rewarding beyond words. They're like gentle cries from the creatures in Greek mythology called Sirens. I know that might be going far, but when she lets her guard down like this and lets me see the real vulnerable and adorably insecure girl who is just as afraid of abandonment as I am, I can't help but wonder if there is something otherworldly, considering she can keep the sweet "angel" façade up for so long before turning angry and ruthless again.

I won't lie, she's almost only like a vulnerable little kitten when she's with me or her mother, but most of the time when she's not hiding behind her sweet, innocent façade to fool the common stranger at school or on the streets, she shows a cruel side of herself that I myself and almost all of the other Hime know very well.

A dark, vicious side that has been forcefully molded from her hatred of men and pedophiles, or in Nao's case, she says that men and pedophiles are one in the same. Hehe.

She has such a pleasant way of thinking, don't you think?

I myself, when I was avoiding being beaten by my foster family growing up, I'd wander on the streets, so I am no stranger to seeing people who'd want to abduct a child for his own perverse desires.

I'll admit, I had near encounters with those types of people, luckily, I had been practicing punching peoples' lights out since I was six, so no one stood a chance against me.

But despite those encounters, I don't believe that ALL men are pedophiles. Almost all of them are perverts, but that does not automatically mean they're pedophiles.

Nao on the other hand……her dark nature that's formed over the years, overshadowing her soul with cold, pitch black webbings over her pained heart has caused her to become cruel, vicious, self-loathing and able to say things that would make you want to curl under a rock and die like a worm.

I love every single part of her, even the cruel parts. I accept and love her for who she is.

Most people, from what I understand, would like a nice, polite, submissive, vulnerable girl that was nice and gracious all the time. Or selfless like Mai. I never wanted any of those things from Nao, never. Well, maybe the vulnerable part, but nothing else.

Nao has it in her head that once someone sees how brutal she really is behind the "cute little girl" act, then they'll treat her the way any common whore would be treated. If that is the case then half the school's population is doomed. And not by Nao's hand. Anyone who treats Nao badly and I hear about it somehow….well, hehe, they'll remember what a mistake they've made for the rest of their lives, which won't be very long.

I smirk from that thought as I lower myself to grind my lower torso against her own, bringing cries softly from her mouth as I undoubtedly arouse her with these actions even further and lick at her neck carefully.

I've seen passed all her defenses. None of what she's thrown at me fools me at all. All I see is the scared little girl hiding behind a ferocious tiger, forced to become more dangerous over the years and forced to hold up another defense, which is the mask of a cute school girl, hiding all the pain and fears underneath.

And unfortunately, also hiding the sweetness and loving nature that she's concealed for so long. As I continually thrust my hips against her pelvis, grinding my groin against her own, and I could literally feel the warm heat at her core build up and leak at the thrusts.

And I'm sure that my pinching her nipples and squeezing her breasts along with doing this isn't helping her from restraining herself either.

I can feel her begin to quake from under me, shaking in pleasure. However, it's too early for me to allow her release now. She needs some time.

I pull away from her reluctantly, of course, restraining my own oncoming orgasm as well.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Nao demands as I remove myself from her, denying her a release. Though I'm not sure why she's so surprised. We've played this game before. And even more perverse ones too.

I smile devilishly at her, and she immediately closes her mouth. She knows better than to challenge me about these things. Even if she wants to get screwed literally, there was no need to yell at me. I would get to that soon.

I slip away from her as she glares at me, and I begin to take off my shirt and shorts. As my shirt goes above my head, blocking my view, I can practically feel the burn of Nao's leer as she looks at me, most likely with hunger, looking at my body.

I restrain a cackle at this as I undress completely. She could say all she wanted about how ugly I was and that she found my ability to "screw her brains out" the only thing that was attractive about me, but her starved gazes that she sends me when she thinks I'm not looking, and the way her eyes dance over my body prove otherwise to her proud claims.

She's so insistent on acting like an insulting "bitch" when I know the real her. She should know by now that all her remarks don't fool me. If anything, it makes me even more worried about her.

She says these things to hurt me, but the reason for them are different. Her motives are not to hurt me, but to bring further pain to herself. Does she think that I can't see that?

Does she really think that I can't see that she's trying to make me hate her because she hates herself and thinks that she doesn't deserve me?

She says these near scarring things to me every night, in hopes that she can save me from having what she believes to be a tragic relationship with her.

When I'm completely naked and my body is facing her and only being shown by the light of the moon outside, I can see Nao looking at me, almost mesmerized. I smirk at this and say teasingly, "Nao, I know you want to touch, but you know our rules. We both need to be naked first to enjoy the other. Get undressed and you'll be able to enjoy me."

Nao glares at me, while blushing and I almost laugh, because I think she wants to smack me. However, she gets undressed a few seconds later and rewards me with the sight of her own gorgeous body.

Though when putting words in context with her, I don't think "gorgeous" or "beautiful" even begins to bring how she looks or is justice.

I'll admit, whenever I watch Nao undress, I feel slightly guilty for telling her to wait, because I have such a hard time restraining myself from flat out ravishing her as I see her bare flesh and unguarded curves.

As a result, as soon as all of her clothes are off, I'm suddenly on her again, and while we both have recovered from nearly climaxing, because neither of us seem to be that wet anymore.

However, I intend to change that….soon.

Actually, it's good we've recovered for now, because it will feel even better when we start again….and when I bring Nao to her peak and send her over the edge screaming.

Yeah, I know. I AM perverted. Far more than you can possibly imagine. Nao and several other of my…heh…fangirls seem to think me prude, honest and strong, but the true me is just as selfish when it comes to Nao as Shizuru was when it came to me.

And I'm far more perverted than even Shizuru could imagine, especially when mixed with my feelings for my dear Nao.

I pin my arms to her legs, keeping her legs down to the bed securely, my face and fingers dangerously close to Nao's sex. I can practically smell Nao's anticipation, along with her arousal….which I can DEFINITELY smell.

I start stroking my thumbs over her labia and I feel the tremors start again. I begin licking my tongue against her core, lapping desperately, a primal instinct in me telling me that if I didn't taste and suck at her now, then I'd go mad.

For the next near two minutes of me stroking and occasionally squeezing her breasts after I've moved my hands up to her chest, and keeping my mouth on her core, licking at almost every wet place there was there, I could feel her start to buck helplessly needing.

However, there was one last thing that we needed to complete for tonight, wasn't there? I couldn't let this end right now, could I?

I suddenly stopped licking and pulled away, once again denying Nao of her orgasm.

Predictably, I hear something that makes me grin between her legs: Nao groaning in sexual frustration.

"Bitch!" I hear her yell at me, and once again, I'm trying not to laugh at her anger, "What are you waiting for?! Fuck me!"

I smirked at this. Oh, Nao…is everything with you always physical and brutal?

"No," I answer in a husky voice, "I think not, sweetie. I think we both know what I'm waiting for."

I feel her tremble, and I hear what I know she feels in her anger, "No, you stupid beast, please…."

I sighed. There was a reason behind what I was doing, and she knew it. And she hated me for it. Hated me for trying to make her feel loved and trying to make her accept that she was loved.

"Say it please." I say gently, stroking my thumbs against her labia, but once again never going through with it.

I feel her shake in my grasp, and I wonder if it's from the continuous denied orgasm, or if she's afraid of saying it. Well, I'll fix both soon, as soon as she says it.

"No……I…" I hear her cry out and I glance up to see that her eyes are wide open in shock at what I'm telling her to do. We've played this game before. She knows what reason I'm doing it for too.

She used to think I meant it as sexual torture, but she's learned better over the times that we've been together. She knows what I want her to say, and that's why she's resisting me even more now.

Because she has it so fixed into her head that she doesn't deserve me.

"Say it!" I yell desperately. I had had enough of her denying herself. I wasn't going to fuck around here……err…..technically speaking of course. I LITERALLY was going to fuck around with her. Hehe.

I can feel her trying to resist saying it as she writhes. She's on the verge of crying, I can tell, but I don't care. She needs this. I need this. I need her to know how much I adore her.

All she wanted was proof that she didn't deserve me. She wanted me to hurt her. She wanted me to show her that she meant nothing because she believed that she was nothing.

This I would not allow.

"Tell me to love you, not fuck you, Nao." I said calmly, slamming in the last nail for the hammer for her to understand what I wanted. I say it calmly, but with such love in my voice, which is accurate to how I feel, so much so that I think I'll break if she doesn't say it.

The next sound I heard came from my broken lover, "Please love me, Natsuki."

I hiss in triumph. She had accepted that I loved her and that I wouldn't stand for her self-loathing. I loved her, I couldn't bear to hear her say these things to me, because I knew she was just trying to prove it to both herself and to me how meaningless she was, and I would not take it.

I dive down at my triumph and bury my tongue fully inside of her, relishing in her taste and smell. It's salty, but rather savory too, if that makes sense. I've often wondered about it. Needless to say, I've had plenty of times to know for sure, but I don't care, I can't stop tasting her and pleasing her.

I slick my tongue against her clit along with thrusting it into her. The results are quite fantastic: she's bucking upwards, writhing and crying out endlessly.

She is my religion, my faith and love. Nao means everything to me.

Her cries take a turn for an extreme as I hear her shriek out one last sound, bucking underneath me hard as I taste a rush of her essence flowing out as a result of her orgasm and greedily suckle it up while making sure to lick all over her core and walls to increase her pleasure.

As her cries, the flow and her body movements subsiding, I slowly pull away and crawl up next to her so that I can embrace her.

I love how she feels in my arms. How much smaller than me she feels like, in both height and strength. I love holding and protecting her like this. I hope that she feels this protected as well when I have her wrapped up in my grasp, her, shielded from the world that was cruel to the both of us.

I smile down at her, hoping she'll smile back, though she just seems dazed right now. I snuggle her close, wanting to make her feel safe and loved, which she more than was in spades.

I love her so much more than you could imagine. And I've seen quite a lot of what love can do to you I might add. Shizuru showed me herself first hand during the Festival. It wasn't pleasant, I can tell yah that much.

My precious little Nao has brought such feelings in me, made me forget my mother, who had become like a god to me before the Festival started. Nao made me forget the pain of my mother's betrayal and of my mother's death.

I've always tried to be for Nao what Shizuru has tried to be for me: a safe haven, a protector and guardian.

I smile, looking into her beautiful emeralds for eyes, watching her usual catty and coy looking face suddenly change to upset. This catches me by surprise, and before I know it, her arms have squirmed out of my grasp and are scratching at my face.

"Get the hell off me, Kuga!" She yelled suddenly as she tried to scratch at my face.

"Nao, what the hell?" I demand, accurate to how confused I feel at her actions.

I force myself over her own body, using my weight to pin her, something I've done in the past to make sure she couldn't get away, and to make her feel secure.

It's often worked too. Whenever she thrashes around in her sleep, in pain from her dreams full of abandonment and hate and abuse, I often place myself over her this way so that she'll feel safe and protected.

However, this didn't seem to work, because Nao actually scratched my face up a little, clawing at my right cheek before I grabbed bother wrists, one in each hand as I held her still and glared at her.

"Alright, Nao," I said strictly, trying to be as…….well, "parental" as possible without being too rough, "What's this about?"

What comes next is totally unexpected to me. She glares at me and snaps, "What, do I have to have a reason for not wanting to sleep with a loser like you anymore?"

Immediately, my eyes widen. The pain that I feel in my chest from those words are almost unbearable. Jesus Christ….was she trying to make things worse for us?

She was just saying these things because she was scared that she didn't deserve this happiness and love. At this, I hardened my temper as I snap, "Nao, would you knock it off? You're just saying this because-"

"Because what?" Nao snapped back, her voice harsher than ever, "Natsuki, we have to stop this. I want to break up with you."

There. There it was. There was the source of what my misery would be caused by. God damn it, Nao. I feel the pain in my heart almost crush the organ as I felt such pain at her words.

Nao, why couldn't you just stab me in the heart?! It would be much less painful for me that way.

I knew that my usually cold façade was shattered in pieces of emotional pain, and I didn't care. "Nao, what…..?" I asked in disbelief.

"Natsuki," Nao snaps, glaring harder even, "We're going to stop this now. We have to."

I just couldn't stop myself from staring at her. Was I really hearing this from my beloved princess?

My survivor of a wildcat, giving up?

"Why?!" I demanded, voicing my disbelief clearly.

The anger in my voice seems to stop Nao from coming up with anything right now. I scowl at her and snap, feeling more anger now than pain at what she was putting us both through, "We're not having this discussion. YOU came into MY bed, night after night, don't you forget. Now you're trying to end what YOU started?"

_I don't think so, darling._ I think to myself, releasing her from my hold, _I love you, and even if YOU started this, I'm not letting you finish it. We're together now and nothing will stop me from loving you. Not even YOU, my sweet. _

I voice my feelings once again, "You've willingly come to my bed night after night, and you expect me to believe you want it to end now?"

Nao took on both a sneering tone and look as she drawled, "What, a girl's not allowed to get tired of her toys?"

"That's a load of bullshit, Nao, and we both know it." I respond, ignoring the sting of pain at her severe remarks.

I knew she meant none of what she said, but it still hurt. It hurt hearing how badly she wanted to be hated, and it hurt hearing the degrading things that could come out of her mouth.

"How hopeful you are, Kuga," She grumbled, glaring at the window, "Tell me, have you always been this desperate to be used and lost? Sheesh, talk about a beggar for the dumpster."

Hearing the remarks deliberately bringing up the thoughts of abandonment so that I would be injured emotionally, I had to force myself to look at her, narrowing my eyes at her, I slowly release her wrists and get up from the bed.

As I walk over to my fallen clothes, I can once again feel Nao's eyes on me, following my bare form. She tells me how unwanted I am, then she follows me around with her eyes.

Nao, your argument isn't very convincing.

I keep my eyes slanted on her as I turn my head away and speaking, "I love you Nao. Nothing will change that, you know."

I see her glare deepen as if I've ruined some plan that she had in mind, and I imagine I did. I thwarted her intentions of "saving" me from having a disastrous relationship with her.

Disastrous, huh? The thoughts that anyone else would hate and hurt her if they saw how angry she really was has not gone unnoticed by me. Over the years, I've noticed things about people.

I know very well how people judge you just because you're not a certain way that everyone else is or a way everyone else wants you to be.

I know how people expect things of you, and when you're not the way they want you to be, you're nothing to them. You're a loser or immature, or worse.

None of what she was saying or would say in the future would change my feelings for her.

I start dressing myself, knowing full well that the night was over between us, for now.

Even as she said her next words, "Kuga, you don't have any idea what you're saying. Fuck off, okay? Who'd want some simpering, whiny bitch like you anyway?"

The pain increased and I close my eyes, trying to suppress my anger. Nao, you truly have the art of inflicting emotional pain down.

I love her and will die for her, and take this pain a million times over for her, however, I have feelings too, and whilst I'll never leave her, no matter how many times she trudges over those feelings, I want her to know that I won't tolerate her talk like this.

"Simpering or not," I answer, letting out a warning tone, "I'm not about to willingly let you go. Anyway, it's not like you really want it to end."

"You can't give me what I need, Kuga," Came the next snap, making me feel more than aggravated at her stubbornness. Usually I find it coy and suggestive. Now I find it irritating as she continues, though I'm not prepared for what she says next, "I could find anyone else. All I'd have to do is show them what they want to see and they'll be all over me. I don't even need to show my real face to get laid."

Within moments, my teeth are clenched and I'm glaring at Nao. God, I couldn't stand this. Nao was putting herself through hell and myself in pain all for the sake of the belief that had been built over the years within her due to self loathing.

I didn't know if I'd be able to stop myself from destroying something, so I clench my fist to restrain myself. Nao's self-destructive pain reaches me and I don't know how much of her blocking me out I can take before I really do something drastic.

I let her know this as I almost growl out, "Nao, we'll discuss this later," I then restrained my self-encouraged smirk as I said, "Though later I think you'll still come to me."

I can see her glare on me deepen, and I know that I've struck a nerve. She knows that she won't be able to refuse what she wants. No matter how deeply she believes that she deserves hell.

My cockiness is rewarded by Nao's wonderfully angered roar, "Think you're such a stud?! Maybe if you wouldn't hold back from just flat out fucking me all the time and wanting me to beg for you, then maybe we wouldn't be having this discussion!"

For the umpteenth time, that was what this was about?! I glared at her. She was such a dumb ass sometimes.

After a pause, Nao continued her foolish tirade, getting up from my bed, "Whatever, either way, we're finished, Kuga."

I scowl, for once ignoring the obviously attractive fact that she's naked. How can I pay attention to that when I feel she's a fool for thinking that it's over between us. She and I both know that it will be far from over. She'll come to me again and again.

Even if she doesn't, even if she's able to stay away from me for at least two nights, I sure won't be able to stay away from her that long.

I know, if I don't see her tomorrow or tomorrow night, whatever small amount of will power I have will erode and I might even do the most evil thing imaginable and force myself on her. I'm an animal, especially when it comes to Nao. I love her, and now I can't stop those feelings.

I personally now feel sorry for Shizuru. She must have suffered so much, trying to keep her feelings towards me at bay. Now it seems the burden of restraint over desire and deep yearning has been left to me, and I'm doing a miserable job at it.

I watch Nao's naked form. It's so hard to stop myself. Hell, if I'm having difficulties forcing myself not to look at her while she's naked, I think you can guess that I'm gonna have difficulties keeping away from her if she stops coming to me.

I don't know if I'll be able to restrain myself. Now I praise Shizuru for having as much restraint as she did for so long.

I can see you tense under my burning gaze. I know that you can sense the intensity of our relationship, Nao. I know you're even afraid of it. Hell, I'm sure she's either creeped out or turned on by my gaze, I can't swear to which of course.

"Keep your stupid, perverted eyes on someone else, Kuga," Nao snapped at me from where she stood, her back facing me, "I don't want you anymore."

I glared. Seriously, not only was this game that she played with me painful, but it really got aggravating. "Yah think I'm going to believe that?" I demand.

"Look," Nao said as she got her shirt and bra on, "Go chase after that Fujino bitch. Someone who actually wants you."

That made me blanch, completely dumbfounded. Where the hell did that one come from?

"Oi, how did Shizuru get back in the picture?" I demand, trying to seed through my own confusion of her remark myself, "Nao, firstly, Shizuru's my friend, so could you not talk about her that way? Secondly, because she's my friend, that's all I see her as. I've told you before. I love only you."

"Why?!" Came the next demand from my angered little kitten, "Why do you love me? I've done nothing except call you names and say that no one could ever love you. Why the fuck do you love me of all people?!"

Well, this might sound odd, but upon hearing this was indeed what that "little" outburst had been all about, I actually felt somewhat relieved. It wasn't because she didn't feel loved enough, it was because she felt TOO loved, just like I had suspected.

I'd fix that.

"Nao, I've told you before," I repeat, hoping to reason with her, "I love you, more than anyone else that has come into my life. I don't care how much of a bitch you are or act. I love you all the same."

I smile, hoping that my conviction of my feelings would convince her, and sure enough, it did, because in response, all she did was sigh in defeat and hang her head, looking at the ground as she grumbled, "I swear, you're a masochist."

At hearing this, I couldn't help but see the perfect opportunity to make a joke out of this. Hey, bad timing, maybe, but I wanted to give her something at least to chuckle about, and her "masochist" remark just seemed too perfect.

"And you are quite the sadist," I say, grinning, "We're perfect for each other. Let's just see it that way."

I can see that Nao's ready to grumble about how much of an idiot I am again, and I say, smiling again, and repeating myself once more, "I've told you before, Nao. I love you. I want to stay with you. I'm going to tell you the same thing I did before, Nao. I'm going to repeat these last two years here till you're out of high school so that we can go to Fuuka College together. Even if you don't believe me, I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

I can tell that this is a little too much for her to comprehend, but she grumbles out, able to make a coherent question, "Why? You could have so much more with Fujino."

I chuckle, finding it quite funny actually that we were having this argument, when previously in the Festival Nao had clearly been jealous of Shizuru, "Ah, but Shizuru and I are just friends. I know how deeply she feels for me, but I can't feel that way back towards her. I love you and only you."

I can see that Nao has no way of putting up any more of a fight, so she doesn't say a word. As for me myself? I'm pleased that she's calmed down, but it still hurts to be reminded what I did to Shizuru. Denying her the love she deserved and making her suffer for all the yearning she felt towards me.

Because I know that feeling all too well now.

_I'm sorry, Shizuru. _I think to myself sadly as I watch Nao, _I wish I could feel that way towards you, but my heart belongs to Nao. _

I then have my attention shifted as I hear the whisper from Nao that captivates me.

"Don't leave me." Was Nao's whimper, almost breaking my heart.

I sigh, telling her the truth, "I never intend to." How could I? How could I leave my baby, my little girl, when we had been through this hell together again and again? I loved my Nao, more than life itself. I was her servant eternally.

As soon as I say what I do, I wrap my arms around her, once again, indulging in the guilty pleasure of holding her so closely as she's captive in my arms.

As I feel her snuggle into my neck, I feel a swell of pride that I'm able to please her in some way. I know I've already pleased her in the purest possible sense tonight, but she deserves any pleasure she gets tonight, and I'm all too happy to indulge her with them.

The fact that she's partially naked and I can feel her bare skin against mine indulges me a great deal as well.

I want her to know just how much she's loved, whether she likes it or not.

"I love you, Nao," I tell her as she snuggles closely, "More than you'll ever know."

**Here's one obviously for Natsuki's POV. I think I might add two or more chapters before closing this fic down, depending on what people want.**


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